Dante's Agent

Dante, buddy, here's the freaking deal.
Your Comedy's too grim - it's got no yucks -
What's more, the scenes you paint just seem unreal.

I have suggestions - Virgil in a tux
Might lighten up the atmosphere a bit.
Give him some wisecracks. Sure, I know hell sucks,

But let him show less wisdom and more wit.
As for your own part, what's with all the swooning?
Sure, the inferno's a dizzying sulphurous pit,

But be a man. Also, consider pruning
All this religious stuff - there's way too much.
And triple rhyming? Jeez. That needs fine tuning.

So take a nice long hike. I'll be in touch.