Quite Contrary

If you are able
To read the label
You know drinking liquor
Makes you die quicker.

Except for all that medical research that says moderate drinking - statistically - adds to longevity.

You've also been told that sunscreen is a vital shield against the deadly solar menace. Except now there's research that says most northerners need more daylight than they're getting.

So stand in the rays
And chug beer for days,
In a blissful tan haze,
At least till the fall
When they may
By the way
Change it all.