FBI On The Case

I got an email from the "FBI" today. They informed me that:

...you are having an illegal transaction with Impostors claiming to be Prof. Charles C. Soludo of the Central Bank Of Nigeria...

That's the bad news. The good news is that I can pay a fee of 20 dollars, and get 800,000 dollars in return. All they need is a lot of my personal information - including my ATM card info.

You might think it was some sort of scam. But not to worry:

Since the Federal Bureau of Investigation has been involved in this transaction, you are now to be rest assured that this transaction is legitimate and completely risk-free as it is our duty to Protect and Serve citizens of the United States Of America.

Somehow I don't recall
this business transaction at all.

And I think it would be unfair
to take what's not really my share.