Valpo

I did a lovely short triathlon today outside of Valparaiso, Indiana, which turns out to be less than an hour from my house, me being on the south side of Chicago and all.

I talked to a man who, at 70, was doing his first triathlon ever.

I saw one bike spill. Someone was dismounting at the bike finish, and over-dismounted, I guess.

The swim was only a quarter mile, which is a distance I can do without really practicing, which I know because that's what I did. My wife says my training is eccentric, which seems to be a polite word for nutty.

I'm fascinated by the way I'm faster when there's competition. So a race is always a more intense workout than an ordinary workout.

It's fun to push the throttle to see
how much speed's inside of me.

Outsourcing Protests

What a great headline from the Wall St. Journal:

To Protest Hiring of Nonunion Help, Union Hires Nonunion Pickets
Jobless Recruits Get Minimum Wage 'To March Around and Sound Off'
...
"For a lot of our members, it's really difficult to have them come out, either because of parking or something else," explains Vincente Garcia, a union representative who is supervising the picketing.

I'd really like to picket,
and chant as I march in line.

But my car might get a ticket,
so pay a kid to hold my sign!

Orestes at Dream Theatre

Orestes is a descent into hell, not a burning inferno, but a honeycomb of broken lives. Electra is searching for her slaughtered brother, and so great is her love that she will journey to Hades for him. She is told, unendingly, by characters who hate her for killing her mother, that her soul is full of violence. But what drives the play is her love for her brother, and her brother's love for her.

Anna Weiler is spectacular as Electra, determined, vulnerable, her every nerve stripped bare. Jeremy Menekseoglu brings back 2 of his roles from prior plays - Orestes and his father Agamemnon. It was good to see them again. They felt like old friends, even though Agamemnon himself is a righteous scoundrel. Cassandra arrives in the form of Alicia Reese, who plays her quite madly and gaily in her way - I thought she looked like the one person who was almost always having a ball on stage. Theresa Neef is regal and a bit nasty as Persephone, the princess who always winters in hell.

Bil Gaines and Giau Truong zestfully reprise their roles as Mermerus and Pheres, the murdered children of Medea, flashing between playfulness, rage, and fear. Rachel Martindale plays the empathetic Pandora, mother of all sorrows with a stage-grabbing air of naturalness, a sort of earth-mother quality. Annelise Lawson is the gossipy tavern keeper, with a cockney sort of accent, who starts us on our journey, and who entertained us with her lovely voice at intermission, singing "My Heart Belongs To Daddy" which perhaps was chosen because of this Cole Porter verse:

I used to fall
In love with all
Those boys who maul
Refind ladies.
But now I tell
Each young gazelle
To go to hell...
I mean, hades.

Dream Theatre relentlessly takes on the fourth wall in this play. The characters of the myths are aware that this night they have an audience - that Electra has an audience on this journey - and the characters wonder aloud what motivates the audience - is it sadism? is it empathy? It's a spookily intimate question, which you don't answer aloud, but which I suppose you do ask yourself.

I'd been to an unadorned reading of the play, some time ago, but tonight the play surprised me.

Months ago I had heard
every single word
but somehow I couldn't tell
that it would play so well
this journey into hell
this sorrowful land down under
flashing and roaring thunder
leaving me gasping in wonder.

It Will All Be An Accident

Good news for me -
I want to go on TV:

An occasional curse word or even Janet Jackson's infamous "wardrobe malfunction" on prime-time TV shouldn't bring down the wrath of the Federal Communications Commission, a federal court ruled Tuesday.

I'll do a baggy pants dance,
which will lead to a wardrobe mischance,
and I'll mutter a very bad word
as I "notice" what has occurred.

Downsizing the Domicile

Guilt can lead to spectacular displays of conspicuous non-consumption:

Or your child may wonder why you have twice the home you need. Kevin Salwen and his wife were so taken by their daughter’s conviction in this particular matter that their family of four decided to sell their 6,500-square-foot home. They bought a new one less than half the size and are giving away about $850,000, more than the price difference between the homes.

What a great story this would make, told casually over an after-dinner brandy. "Oh, this place? Yes, we chose it because the other place was just too big. Felt we owed it to the planet to sell it off. Gave the profit to charity. It was the right thing to do."

Guilt is a thing that gnaws at your gut.
And there's no shortage. There's a glut.

Navel Power

In an odd scientific development, belly-button placement is being credited with sports success:

The navel is the center of gravity of the body, and given two runners or swimmers of the same height, one black and one white, "what matters is not total height but the position of the belly-button, or center of gravity," Duke University professor Andre Bejan, the lead author of the study, told AFP.

Who knew that navel-gazing could lead to sports science discoveries?

I suspect the reason that I'm so-so in a sprint
is simply excess belly button lint.

Orestes on Thursday

On Thursday I'm going to see the opening of Orestes at Dream Theatre. I'm being warned it's a depressing play, so if you're in town, come keep me company. We can do a mutual suicide-prevention watch.

The action involves Electra going to Hades to look for her brother, Orestes.

Trips to hell
rarely end well.

Cake Sonnet

She concentrates upon the layered cake
she ladles out with paints of pink and blue
sparkling in the air and mixed to make
a strange creation in a lavender hue.

The kitchen where she works is ordinary:
broad countertops and cabinets galore.
She is the one who brings the hint of faery.
She is the one who adds the something more.

Now who shall dare to eat this bright confection?
Will it transform you into something odd?
Should you stay away for your own protection?
Is it a meal fit only for a god?

You know you want to try it - take a taste.
Don't let your magic moment go to waste.


Yes, it's another reflection on "Cake", by Jennifer Cronin. [UPDATE: as much a flight of fancy as a reflection, I should say.]
Detail:

Wheeling Through The Woods

At last, yesterday, I finished the first draft of the play I have been working on, tentatively entitled "Wild Flowers". Now I know how it ends!

I feel strangely lucky, because my play involves a Russian spy, and the news is suddenly full of Russian spies!

So today, newly freed from dramatic labor pains, I allowed myself a few hours of exercise in the warm weather.

I took a lovely bicycle ride;

the trail had wildflowers on the side.

This Is John Aglialoro Speaking

At the conference, we saw a brief promo clip about the "indie" filming of Atlas Shrugged, part one.

Mostly we saw the talking head of John Aglialoro, the producer. He affirmed that this version is intended for release, not just an "ashcan copy" to maintain intellectual property rights. At 2 weeks into a 5 week shooting schedule, he said he was pleased about how things had gone so far.

I've seen him talk in person, and he seems like a straight shooter.

From the 5 second teaser of an actor talking about oil dependence, it looked like they might be doing a lot of green-screen technology for the backgrounds.

Well, we'll see.

Anyway, as for me,

I'm waiting for Atlas Shrugged 3D.

Hug A Planet Today

A philosopher ponders the question "got a minute for the environment?"

...I asked, “Which environment do you mean? Whose environment?” The question seemed to startle the person. “You know, the environment. Like, the Earth.”

He gets around to the human habit of taking things into our own hands:

In any environment that humans occupy today, disentangling the man-made from the natural would take the most complex investigation, if indeed it is possible at all.

Not that he's recommending that.

Living in the wild,

technology disentangled,
the nature-loving child

would probably end up mangled.

Plato on the Plane

Took a 4-lecture course, at the conferece, on Plato's Phaedo, which I read in college but not since. You know, I think I took a full Plato course, but it's been 37 years or so.

I was trying to read the work on the plane, coming home, but I fear post-conference fatigue was kicking in.

Even when fully awake,
the theory of forms is confusing;
My poor brain needed a break
So soon enough I was snoozing.

Jackson Didn't Take Action?

Latest Blago fallout:

The judge calls for a recess just as Rajinder Bedi is about to finish the story about his Oct. 28, 2008 meeting with Jesse Jackson Jr.

Without the jury present, Prosecutor Christopher Niewoehner explains that Jackson, fund-raiser Raghu Nayak and Rajinder Bedi met at the 312 Restaurant in Chicago.

And that's when Nayak discusses raising $1 million for Blagojevich for Jackson's appointment.

Just to be clear, Jesse Jackson Jr. is a congressman and is the son of the really famous Jesse Jackson.

Was Jackson entertaining the idea of a trade - his friend would raise 1 million for Blago, if Blago would give the senate seat to Jackson?

I gather that's what the prosecutor wanted to get before the jury. But, to be fair, entertaining an illegal plan is not the same as taking a concrete step to put such a plan into action.

It's the concrete step that bursts your bubble
and lands you in legal trouble.

Merely considering crime must fail
as a basis for jail.

Avoid Them Like The Plague

Can't be good news:

The Los Alamos Campground in the Angeles National Forest will be closed for the next eight days as officials investigate a case of a squirrel testing positive for the plague.

That's in Los Angeles County, where the City of L.A. is.

If you're visiting L.A.
keep the squirrels at bay.

The iBrain App

Someone said today that in the future, we might all have portable brain scanners feeding into our PDAs, so we could make real-time corrections when the wrong part of the brain was working.

If you could watch your brain
In color on your phone,
Would you really gain
Superior mental tone?

By staring at the locus
Of your neural action,
Will your power of focus
Pick up better traction?

July 4

From the east to the west
And the south to the north
I'm wishing you all
A happy 4th!

And for non-USA persons everywhere,
I hope you have a great day, even though it's not a holiday there.

Independence

Rebellion was declared
by thoughtful men who dared.

Price Tags

If you've been following le Affaire Blago, you might have wondered why the Gov was so desperate for fresh moolah. Well, a government accountant ran some numbers:

Schindler reviewed the financial records of Blagojevich during his time as governor and said he and his wife spent more than $400,000 on clothes during that time frame, more than they spent on the mortgage for his North Side home.

Blagojevich dropped $205,706 alone with Oxxford, a tailor with a reputation for sewing high-end custom suits. On one day alone in December 2006, Blagojevich charged $20,000 with the suit maker, his credit card records showed.

Let's be fair. The "time frame" seems to be about 5 years. So, really, they were only spending $80,000 per year on clothes. Big deal!

He was always well dressed
and had fabulous hair.
Who would have guessed
he was not on the square?

With all his great gab
they should let him skate by!
Prison's too drab
for a sharp looking guy.

Backhanded Compliment

Kathleen Parker, a columnist at the Washington Post, has a new theory:

If Bill Clinton was our first black president, as Toni Morrison once proclaimed, then Barack Obama may be our first woman president.

Ouch. She claims to be saying it "in the nicest possible way." But is there a nice way to say something like this?

Maybe she's using that technique where someone asks: are you a real man or not? You know, to dare the guy into doing something bold.

If so, I think it's a futile gesture on her part. His leadership style is what it is. I don't think he can change it.

Or maybe she finds it professionally advantageous
to increase her page views by writing something outrageous.

Can You Hear Me Now? Ouch!

If you look close at the guy in the middle, there's a little white circle in front of his face.

That's a baseball, bouncing off his head.

You can watch the scary-funny video here of this Yankee fan - on a cellphone - getting bopped.

Even when you're gabbing in the stands,
keep your eye on the game, and be ready with your hands.

Kitty Rebellion

Marsha put some topical anti-bug stuff on the cats, and one of them, Stella, was not happy at all. She bolted outside and refused, at least for a while, to come back in.

She stared at us with daggers,
telling us how she felt
about this vile pollution
upon her precious pelt.

Ordinance Shot Down

Our ban against the one-hand gun
has been undone.

The mayor is unhappy, and plans to revise our ordinance, with new regulations to protect us.

We'll see what the City Council passes, I guess. Then we'll see what the Federal Courts say about whether the regulations overburden a constitutional right.

Otis McDonald is happy. He's the plaintiff whose name is on the case.

“I was feeling the poor blacks who years ago had their guns taken away from them and were killed as someone wished. That was a long time ago, but I feel their spirit. That's what I was feeling in the courtroom. It was rough on me that way,” McDonald said.

I remember when this law was first passed, in 1982. Jane Byrne was mayor then. I attended a couple of City Council meetings, and wrote letters to my alderman, etc., against it. But it passed. And in Media World, all was joy and happiness.

But, 28 years later, it looks like a failed experiment.

You open people to harm
when you deny them arms.

Symbologist Needed

This painting hangs in a Mexican restaurant. I kind of like it but I find the system of the symbols baffling. Lots of food, but also butterfly wings and a skull and a light bulb. I need that "symbologist" guy from the Da Vinci Code to unravel it for me. Then I'll be able to find the secret treasure.

Visually, I am reminded of Catholic portrayals of the Immaculate Heart of the Virgin Mary.

But in this work of art, she's been enchanted.
Instead of a heart, she's got a pomegranate.

Today's Trip

My friend Lynn celebrated her 70th with 2 "Happy 35th" cakes.

The party was in Madison, WI.

We stopped at a tollway oasis, on the way up, and my wife somehow made the acquaintance of a young woman from France, who was sort of stranded there.

She was lugging a huge backpack, and had been in Yellowstone 2 days ago.

French friends had dropped her off at the oasis to catch public transportation to downtown Chicago. Oops.

We detoured and took her to the nearest commuter train station.
I certainly hope she reached her destination.

Student Loans

As a follow-up to my post about Monetizing Emma yesterday, I wanted to mention that I suspect our current federally-sponsored student loan system is already causing some big problems.

I think it's something like what Fannie Mae helped do for the housing market. I think the student loan program has helped to inflate the cost of college, and I suspect it's a bubble waiting to burst.

Kids are graduating under amazing loads of debt, and I wonder whether a lot of them wouldn't be better off just starting work somewhere.

You hear that most jobs now "require" a college degree, but they don't, not really. Many employers are using the possession of a college degree as a proxy for being able to read, write, and do arithmetic.

When colleges start to go under,
everyone will wonder
why no one ever explained
that their price growth couldn't be sustained.

Monetizing Emma

I had a good time seeing Monetizing Emma last night, an imaginative near-future play with some surprising plot twists and a heroine out of Jane Austen.

It's a New York play performed in a Chicago theatre by an Indiana theatre company. It was crisply directed by Laura Gouin, and the actors were all lively. I especially liked the performance by Lisa Caskey, who plays a ruthless corporate ladder-climber.

Here's a detailed review from its Manhattan debut last year.

The premise of the play is a new version of student loans for college. Instead of being run through a government program, financiers are setting up vehicles to invest in high-performing high school students. The students, and their families, get lots of cash now. But investors get a chunk of their earnings in the future.

The downside, for our heroine, is that she's not sure she wants to pursue a lucrative career. She's more interested in majoring in English.

Such is the dilemma
facing clever Emma
who does find her way
by the end of the play.

Saving Face

Preserving an old-fashioned brick facade,

with a new steel tower. I thought it looked odd.

Behold

A fully functioning Death Eye.
Its power will amaze!
Pity that poor passerby
who stands in the path of its rays.

Actually, it's a giant eyeball, with iris and pupil not yet installed. You know, art. Oops, I mean Art. With a capital A. By which I mean to say, it's something to occupy space, gouged from giant's face.

Duh

Not what I would call a shock:

Swinger Shock: Older Age No Defense Against STDs

Those Who Engage in 'Swinging,' Even at an Older Age, Have High STD Risk

According to the article, these older folks are somehow clueless about the risks of condomless coupling with friends of friends.

You can see how something could spread quickly in such a sharing group.

Swingers who neglect to use protection,
can expect an unpleasant infection
circling in their direction.

Stormy Weather

I went to yoga class tonight. It was just me and the instructor. Usually the class is packed.

But there were tornado warnings.

The instructor came despite the warnings.

I came in total ignorance of the warnings... although I did think the weather was looking sort of "ark of the covenant".

No tornado arrived,
so I survived -
despite lots of bending
that seemed never-ending.

Retroactive Grade Boost

The NY Times had an article yesterday which discussed Loyola Law School Los Angeles:

The school is retroactively inflating its grades, tacking on 0.333 to every grade recorded in the last few years. The goal is to make its students look more attractive in a competitive job market.

Sounds devilishly clever. But who told those blabbermouths at the Times?

Imagine. There you are, being interviewed by Big Law Firm, and the hiring partner looks at your GPA and says, "Wait. Loyola L.A.? Let me get out my calculator to see what your grade really is!"

Letting people in on the trick
is not so slick.

Flashes

Our power has been on for 2 whole days again. I'm not quite used to it. I keep thinking "isn't it great to have electricity again!"

There are more storms brewing, they say. A little while ago, I stood in front of the house, and watched distant lightning, which I could not yet hear. It's also lightning bug season here, and they, too, were flashing up a storm.

On our front lawn
the fire flies
winked off and on,
while in the skies
hot lightning flashed
in distant chains.

No thunder crashed,
no pouring rains
came down in a flood
of watery woe
as I calmly stood
and watched the show.

Cake

This is a phone photo of my spectacular surprise gift for father's day AND my upcoming birthday: a big canvas, "Cake", by Jennifer Cronin. It was part of her recent show at the Elephant Room Gallery.

I know I mentioned it before as my favorite of the show, and now I get to see it all the time!

It's funny, isn't it, how you are just struck by a certain artist's work. In Cronin's case, I first saw a couple of her paintings in an art show at Dream Theatre. I noticed I was spending a lot of time staring at her paintings. It wasn't just that they were beautiful, but they made me feel something I had trouble putting a name on. I think when art really speaks to you, the experience is often like that - hard to describe.

Which is why people like to say
that words get in the way.

Personally, I think words CAN get in the way, but I also think that if you wait, and let the words form over time, one by one, as you contemplate the work, you can learn what it is saying to you.

You start off feeling dumb,
but watch; the words will come.

SSERT

Today, while I was driving to my brother Mark's house - to borrow his generator - I saw an odd vehicle.

It looked a lot like an armored truck that moves money around. But it was painted green. And it had flashing lights and a siren like a police vehicle. It was going somewhere in a hurry. On its side were letters: SSERT

I guessed, correctly: South Suburban Emergency Response Team.

Here was the emergency:

A standoff in Oak Lawn between police and a man upset over losing power because of Friday's storms ended with the man arrested.
...
An armored vehicle was also on the scene, Graziadei said.

Even though you're without light
and cable and TV
and hot water and A/C
you oughtn't start a fight
with the S.S.E.R.T.!

Workaround

Power's been out for hours,
but by means of cellphone towers
I post this verse,
admittedly terse.

Disappointing Recovery

I was unhappy to see this headline:

New jobless claims up sharply as layoffs persist, raising concerns about recovery's strength

I don't have firm opinions on the recession's length or the recovery's strength. But to me it looks like the government's attempts to manage the situation have been less than ideal.

I know that in a recovery,
employment may often lag.
But it's a grim discovery
to see it soften and sag.

Earthworm Census Needed

An appeals court has ruled that the Giant Palouse Earthworm is not yet eligible for "endangered species" status.

The giant Palouse earthworm has fascinated scientists for decades after long being written off as an extinct creature that once lived in the Palouse region of the Washington-Idaho border.

Scientists believed these earthworms were vanished from the earth. Then a couple popped up. This year.

They weren't as extinct
as them people thinked;
they were just sliding,
underground hiding!

Sanitized

That's Winston Churchill, as he's currently pictured at a London museum, missing his trademark cigar.

He was chomping on the cigar in the original photo.

Apparently someone wanted to retroactively cure him of his nicotine habit.

It seems like kind of a joke -
Winston's cigar went up in smoke.

Maybe Earplugs Would Help

 image from Wikipedia article.

If you've watched any of the World Cup, you've probably heard the weird wall of sound that accompanies the game. The noise is from a local South African instrument, a horn called a vuvuzela, churned out cheaply in plastic in large quantities. Apparently it's driving some of the players crazy. But the organizers aren't too sympathetic:

'Vuvuzelas are here to stay and they will never be banned.'

The wail of the horn
somehow sticks
like a thorn
in your mind.

And you find
in the game
that your kick's
lost its aim.

Suicide Defied

An upbeat story from the land down under:

In nearly 50 years Don Ritchie, 84, has saved at least 160 people at The Gap, a rocky cliff at the entrance to Sydney Harbour - and he is still on suicide watch.

Lost souls who stood atop the cliff, wondering whether to jump, say their salvation was a soft voice breaking the sound of the wind and the waves, asking: "Why don't you come and have a cup of tea?"

Have a cup of tea -
and continue to be.

Dirty Shoes

I crossed the open field
as the rain began to plop.

The ground began to yield
turning softer with each drop.

I thought I could outrun
the coming mini-flood.

But just before I'm done
the path turned into mud.

Someone Probably Does Have A Website With A Count

I saw Sex In The City 2, in which the 4 friends visit Abu Dhabi and have trouble with local customs.

I know this will not come as a shock, but it's not really aimed at the male mind.

I wonder if anyone knows
how many times they changed their clothes.

Gwen and Gwen

I saw a play called "Gwen and Gwen" tonight, in an MPTG production. It's about a woman, just released from a mental institution, who is haunted by an imaginary alter ego. Their conversations make up the bulk of the drama.

Colleen Winters, who plays the flashy alter ego, was a joy to watch, and the other performances were all solid. I think Kevin McSweeney, who directed, really outdid himself. He was joking afterwards, calling it a "feel good" play. I told him the play felt good at the end, but it drags you through hell to get there.

A journey through hell
can end well.

Chairman of BP, Invited at Last

As the oil spills on, our president has not yet called the BP CEO. The White House press secretary explained:

"Look, the CEO is elected by the board. Anything that the CEO wants to do has to be approved by the board," Gibbs said.

So... our president has called the BP chairman of the board, the true big kahuna, right?

For some reason, no.

But - UPDATE - the president has now requested a meeting, at his house:

President Obama has formally requested a meeting with Carl-Henric Svanberg, Chairman of the Board of BP, and any other “appropriate officials” from BP next Wednesday, June 16th at the White House.

The way I read this, our president was initially reluctant to "get involved" with the oil mess, because he wanted to "stay above" it.

It's a distraction from his agenda. But now he has been drawn in, by repeated public demands.

I'm not sure what he can actually do
about the spew of ugly goo.

Hawks Win

The Chicago Blackhawks have taken the Stanley Cup, for the first time since 1961. Fireworks have been sounding around my house for 10 minutes now. I expect they'll go on for an hour, at least.

It was a great game, tied at the end of regulation time, going into sudden death overtime.

With icy control
and a dose of luck
they stuck the puck
inside the goal.

Barcelona Nights

Rhythmic guitar music heard by chance
brings me back to that delightful hour
when I could watch you whirl in the dance
reveling in your body's living power.

That hour is past. But when the strings are strummed
I feel your heartbeat near, I see your eyes.
And pain that time has mercifully numbed
comes rolling back to me in sharp surprise.

Darling girl, you did not dance so well,
and yet, you loved it so, were so enraptured,
you were a joy to watch. I cannot tell
what I would give to have it all recaptured.

It fades away, the pulsing music gone.
In silence then your magic lingers on.

Kant and Abstract Art

When Rand writes:

...the father of modern art is Immanuel Kant (see his Critique of Judgment).

People snort.

But when Roger Kimball writes:

It is not surprising that the Critique of Judgment became an important theoretical document for those interested in abstract art: in Kant’s view, the purest beauty was also the most formal.

People give him a respectful hearing.

I'm not saying Kant would have enjoyed abstract art.
But some of his ideas may have helped it get a start.

If all that's important is form and the medium,
then representation is truly tedium.

Soccer, Threat or Menace?

Soccer might seem, at first glance, to be a harmless diversion, a silly game. But on closer examination, it stands revealed as a systematic attack upon the use of arms, and hands too.

Doesn't the Bill of Rights protect our use of arms? And aren't hands protected in the penumbra?

America has long been the last best hope of mankind against soccer-mania. But there are signs we are starting to succumb. Listen to the words of one self-described soccer "fanatic":

Soccer has matured in this country over a period of 30 years. What’s interesting to me is that many American soccer fans have come to love the game through participating instead of through the media. This has created an understanding of the game. There’s a stealth wave that the traditional sports media have ignored.

Big surprise - our media chose to ignore a "stealth wave" of fanatics.

Get your heads out of the sand!
It's an evil sport where arm and hand
are systematically banned.

Jeff Win

The "Jeff Awards" are Chicago's theater awards. Tonight some friends of mine have reason to celebrate:

Receiving an award for its first Jeff-eligible production was Dream Theatre Company's "The Black Duckling," which scored for Trevor Watkins' Original Incidental Music.

I know Trevor and everyone else at Dream, and I am very happy for them.

The term "incidental music" doesn't quite cover how important Trevor's score was to this show. The Black Duckling was done in the style of a silent movie - actors performed without voice, while music played fairly continuously in the background.

Trevor performed most of the music too, on piano and flute. It's quite haunting music. I have the CD.

I know that Trevor worked very closely with Jeremy Menekseoglu, the writer/director/visionary of this truly unusual theater piece. Jeremy had some idea of what he wanted the music to convey, and Trevor was able to create that music.

It's a big moment for all concerned, in terms of winning recognition.

Congrats to Dream and Trevor,
for your first Jeff ever!

Troublemakers Park

I ran by a park today, in the town of Calumet Park, Illinois. I don't recall seeing a sign, on site, with the park name. But it's official name is: Troublemakers Park.

Mostly it's wide open space, with a baseball diamond.

When I went by, at 1 pm on a pleasant Sunday, the park was completely empty.

I wonder if reverse psychology at work. The name seems to say: Troublemakers - come here!

Did those who want to rebel
go elsewhere to raise hell?

SpaceX in Orbit

A private company, known as SpaceX, has constructed a rocket, and used it to put a dummy capsule into orbit.

From the NY Times:

The success was a major boon to those supporting President Obama’s proposal to turn the launching of astronauts over to private companies. A spectacular failure would have provided ammunition to opponents who call Mr. Obama’s approach too risky.

It's nice to be able to say, for once: I support our president's program!

Private companies construct our fighter jets. There's no real reason they can't construct our rockets.

Let free competition
supply the ignition.

Sonnet for Ajax

This is a rhymed synopsis of the hero's fate in Sophocles' play about Ajax.

Slaughtering cattle in the mad belief
that they were men of war who had betrayed him,
meaning to bring his fellow Greeks to grief,
he kills dumb beasts. A goddess had waylaid him.

She who stood for wisdom filled his mind
with folly. She protected other men;
but as day breaks, he's left alone to find
his fame lies mired in the livestock pen.

His stolen bride now begs him, “Take a rest.
No need to make decisions in a hurry.
A day of watchful waiting would be best.”
He reassures her, tells her not to worry.

He leaves his tent and marches to the shore.
He falls upon his sword, and speaks no more

Ajax

I just finished Ajax, by Sophocles. I was quite startled when he killed himself on stage.

In Greek tragedies, death usually occurs off stage.

After they've gone to glory
a witness gives us the story
with details ghastly and gory.

Laugh Leading

Ann Althouse writes:

When I go to the movies or a play, I find that I myself am a laugh leader. It don't laugh loudly, but I am the first person to laugh at a lot of things, and I get other people laughing. I'm not trying to go first. It's just that a lot of Americans — especially at high-art type movies and plays — are too polite or insecure about laughing.

I think 2 things are going on here: permission and contagion. People need permission to laugh at things that they fear are too serious to laugh at. And laughter is contagious. Most of us have had the experience of laughing along with someone, even when we had no idea why the other person was laughing.

That's why they put laugh tracks on a lot of TV comedies - permission and contagion.

But sometimes laughter brings out anger from others - particularly when they sense that their values are being ridiculed. It's not always true to say "Laugh and the world laughs with you."

I remember a time when I went to see a performance of Mary Stuart, a play I admire.  But it was being performed in a campy style.

The first half got some laughs
But not from me.
As for the second half,
I did not stay to see.

No Time For Comedy

I finished reading No Time For Comedy, by S. N. Behrman, which is itself a comedy. It concerns a playwright who has been persuaded that he shouldn't write comedy any more.

It turns out, in the end, that he should write a comedy after all, and the action which the audience has been watching turns out to be the source of that new play.

I thought this was quite self-referential for a 1939 play. Deathtrap, by Ira Levin, plays extensively with the same idea.

I hadn't heard of Behrman, or this play, but he was a popular playwright of the time.

The Broadway production featured a young Laurence Oliver as the playwright. It was his first big Broadway role. He wowed the New York crowd.

Periodically they tell you that comedy is dead,
that the world situation is so filled with doom and dread
that there really is no mental room remaining for bright laughter.

But - you can bet - you'll hear a joke, and chortle shortly after.

Easy Come, Easy Go

Let's say you won 9.7 million British pounds in the Lotto. You might think you were set for life. And maybe you would be. But not Michael Carroll:

The 26-year-old, who squandered his multi-million fortune on drugs, gambling and thousands of prostitutes, has since February claimed £42 a week in jobseeker's allowance.

But he is keen to get off the dole and back to earning £200 a week collecting rubbish near his home in Downham Market, Norfolk.

He burned through all his Lotto cash,
and now it's back to hauling trash.

Young Robin

I found this little birdie on my way home from the train.
Why he sat there for this portrait, is what I can't explain.

Ridge Run 2010

I do this neighborhood 10k, the Ridge Run, every Memorial Day, since 1983.

Last year my time was 53 minutes, even. This year my time was 58 minutes and 20 seconds.

So I took almost one extra minute per mile.

But look at it this way:

Last year I was 22nd out of 61 males aged 55-59. This year I was 20th out of 61 males aged 55-59.

So I moved up 2 places.

The difference, I think, was the weather. Last year it was 60F. This year it was 80F and very humid.

So I ask you, in a verse:
Was I better? Was I worse?

Day of Remembrance

I watched our neighborhood Memorial Day parade today.

On the military side, there were some vets, and a high school ROTC unit. The ROTC group looked very disciplined. The vets looked like ordinary guys.

We also had the local pro-peace group, with the "Support our troops - bring them home" message. I think the Quakers were involved. The pro-peace people have a characteristic look. To me it looks like a mix of moral righteousness and fear. I've seen this look at most antiwar protests I have observed.

I always wonder about the fear I perceive. I suspect it may be that the acceptance of pacifism, as an outlook, is actually fear-inducing.

Does announcing that you will never rebuff a violent attack
leave you worried that someone might just take a whack?

Beach Fun

Showed some young boys how to:

1) dig a hand-sized tunnel between two holes in the sand.

2) dig to the water table - which is lake level.

It's crucial that beach building techniques are passed on to the next generation!

Wet sand sets
and is best for building castles.

Dry sand flies
in your eyes and gives you hassles.

Spill Defies Kill

Top flop:

In a demoralizing setback, BP engineers said Saturday that the "top kill" effort to stem the flow of oil gushing from a well a mile beneath the surface of the Gulf of Mexico had failed and that after consultation with government officials they had decided to move on to another strategy.

As environmental disasters go, it's titanic.
Even though the oil is all natural and organic.

Russian Authors Are So Cheery

Do they have an Anna Karenina station too?

The opening of a Moscow Metro station named after Fyodor Dostoevsky has been postponed after complaints that murals decorating the platform walls are too depressing. The images, drawn from the 19th-century novelist’s works, could prompt depressed commuters to kill themselves, critics say.

It's hard to really relax
as the train clacks by on steely tracks
and you contemplate dying by ax.

What a Catch

This four-year old risks his neck
when he chooses to misbehave,
but before he hits the deck,
a shopkeeper makes the save.

Elderly Or Not, He Took His Shot

Here in Chicago, an 80 year-old army vet shot and killed a burglar this morning. It sounds like the vet had a pistol, in defiance of our handgun ban.

And it sounds like he will NOT be prosecuted for the offense, which would be a misdemeanor anyway. That's usually how these cases are handled.

The vet's son spoke out against our current ban:

"That's an open door for people like this suspect to enter people's homes, especially [the] elderly. They can prey on them," said Butch Gant.

The victim had a gun.
The burglar's days are done.

Robert W. Service

In the comments to a recent post, brought up Robert Service, who wrote some very popular poems, many set in the icy wastes of the Yukon.



He is not trendy among scholars. He died in 1958.

I was looking at his Wikipedia entry, and came across this:

Service is also noted for his use of ethnonyms that would normally be considered offensive "slurs", but with no insult apparently intended. Words used in Service's poetry include jerries (Germans), dago (Italian), pickaninny (in reference to a Mozambican infant), cheechako (newcomer to the Yukon and Alaska gold fields, usually from the U.S.), nigger (African-American), squaw (Aboriginal woman), and Jap (Japanese).

In other words, he sometimes writes like Clint Eastwood talks in Gran Torino.

Which now that I think about it, is probably part of the reason he is not trendy among scholars.

The Cremation of Sam McGee is probably his greatest hit. He uses an interesting rhyme form. Here are the first 2 "regular" lines:

Now Sam McGee was from Tennessee, where the cotton blooms and blows.
Why he left his home in the South to roam ‘round the Pole, God only knows.

At first it just looks like a rhyming couplet, but if you read it aloud you immediately realize that each line has 2 internal rhymes as well. Complicated. But he made it sound easy.

Robert Service could tell a story so well, and move it so smoothly along,
that when it turned odd, you didn't shout "God! This narrative's truly gone wrong."

Instead you just listened about ice that glistened and someone who laughed in the flame,
and when it was done, you thought "That was fun," and saw why he has lasting fame.

Intermission

Cottony seeds
caught in the wind
glowed as if gold
under the street light.

They sweep over cars
hovering boldly
hoping for haven
deep in the night.

Role Reversal

I saw Alicia Reese doing Electra tonight, while Anna Weiler played Angry Chorus Girl.

The actresses switched their roles.
The characters carried new souls.

The Electra Variatons

I read this in a beautiful review of Dream Theatre's Electra:

On top of which, Menekseoglu pulls in elements from all three tragedians—Aeschylus, Sophocles, and Euripides—both to develop this retelling’s fullest dramatic impact and to create the most feminist Electra ever. The women of his Electra are dangerous daughters and granddaughters of Leda and Zeus. Even when they look their meekest, they should never be underestimated.

Somehow, I hadn't realized, or didn't remember, that we had versions of the Electra story from all 3 of these classic Greek tragedy-writers.

I must admit, I've read of all of Aristophanes, the classic Greek comedy-writer. But I'm weak on the tragic Greeks.

So I've now read Sophocles' Electra and Euripides' Electra. And I'm in the middle of re-reading Aeschylus' The Libation Bearers, which tells the same basic story.

And I asked myself, why hasn't anyone put the 3 plays together in one book? Oops. Someone has.

How easy, then, to study
the changes in this bloody
drama as each man
reworks it to his plan.

The Mental Game

Discover recently ran article entitled "The Brain: Why Athletes Are Geniuses". The title is hype, but does draw attention to the fact that a lot of athletics involves unusual neurological abilities:

Even a sport as seemingly straightforward as pistol shooting is surprisingly complex. A marksman just points his weapon and fires, and yet each shot calls for many rapid decisions, such as how much to bend the elbow and how tightly to contract the shoulder muscles. Since the shooter doesn’t have perfect control over his body, a slight wobble in one part of the arm may require many quick adjustments in other parts. Each time he raises his gun, he has to make a new calculation of what movements are required for an accurate shot, combining previous experience with whatever variations he is experiencing at the moment.

Many of them take easy classes in college.
But they do excel at one form of knowledge.

Heil in Style

The 18ft high posters of the Nazi leader advertise a line of clothing for young people and adorn street corners and bus stops in Palermo, Sicily's biggest city.

The ads show the Fuhrer in a lurid pink uniform, with his swastika armband replaced with one bearing a bright red heart, above the slogan "Change Style – Don't Follow Your Leader".

As you might guess, this ad has upset many.

Even in pink,
he still has a stink.

15 CM = 6 INCHES

From the bizarre death department:

A young mother died after doctors failed to spot a 15cm-long toilet brush handle embedded in her buttock.

She was drunk and fell on the toilet brush which somehow impaled her butt. And doctors - from 2 hospitals - took 2 years to figure it out.

And when they did figure it out, she died when they tried to remove it.

Did she have health insurance? Yes, national health insurance. In England.

Her husband says:

I think it was probably down to the hospitals trying to save money and doing things as cheaply as possible.

Lives can be lost
controlling cost.

Still Standing

I'm not content with the famous version of this quote any longer:
What does not kill us... maims us or makes us stronger.

Electa by Sophocles

I finished reading Electra by Sophocles. Liked it. Very moving in places.

I find myself liking Sophocles best of the 3 extant ancient Greek tragedy writers.

He is also said to have commented on his peers. He remarked that Aeschylus did the right thing in drama without knowing what he was doing, and, comparing himself to Euripides, he commented, "I portray men as they ought to be, Euripides as they are."

The tension between the real and ideal
shows as opposing streaks in the Greeks.

Simon Says

Roger L. Simon writes about Chicago:

Someone named Daley has been the city’s mayor since somewhere in the Early Paleolithic Age. Chairman Mao didn’t last as long.

We had a Mayor Daley when I was a kid. And we have one now. They are father and son. That much is true.

But in between we elected our first woman mayor, Jane Byrne, and our first black mayor, Harold Washington. What are they, chopped liver?

No matter what you hear
about our imperfections
I want to make one thing clear:
we do in fact have elections.

Bipartisan Scandal Round-Up

Republican:

After non-abstinent action
with Ms. Jackson,
Congressman Souder
is suddenly taking a powder.

Democrat:

Also, as you may have heard,
Mr. Blumenthal "misplaced" words.
Now he's gone from war time hero,
to someone whose time in 'Nam was zero.

Rand-slide

From Louisville, KY:

Rand Paul defeated Republican establishment favorite Trey Grayson in the GOP primary for U.S. Senate, a closely watched race that was a key test of the tea party movement's strength.

After starting as the underdog, Paul won with 65% of the vote.

It's interesting that his win was so big, since he's a very libertarian Republican, very far from being a social conservative in many respects.

I admit I haven't followed the race, I'm not up on the nuances, and I'm weak on Kentucky politics. I have no idea how he'll do in November.

But it's nice to see the GOP
run a candidate
who wants to go on a chopping spree
against the creeping state.

Obama's Aunt Gets Asylum

Obama's aunt, who was ordered to be deported by a judge in 2004, has finally won asylum.

"The asylum process is confidential and she wants to keep it that way," her attorney Scott Bratton told the Associated Press today. "She doesn't want people to feel sorry for her."

So don't expect to find out too much about the decision. We do know that she beat the odds:

Of the 343 applications from Kenya in 2008, only 60 were granted asylum.

The case does show how spottily we enforce our immigration laws. She was ordered out by a judge.

Instead she simply stayed.
Now that choice has paid.

It's not that we don't deport anyone. We do. One government estimate I see for 2008 is 234,000 deportees. Of course, some of those return. I'm not sure how the government handles the counting of the repeat customers.

I imagine Obama's aunt had better legal help this time around. Obama says he didn't help her. But I bet someone somewhere decided that she was deserving of support.

High profile cases
win benefactors' graces.

Wedding

My wife's younger brother, who is deaf, got married yesterday, to a woman from France, in our house, in a Native American ceremony.

My wife organized most of it, so she was focused on getting everything right. After the ceremony was over, she realized that she had never turned off our telephones. Fortunately, no one called!

Other than the very normal feature of the bride and groom being slightly late,

it all went great.

The Cronin Show

I dropped by The Elephant Room Gallery today, to get a look at Jennifer Cronin's show of new paintings, which has been garnering positive critical attention.

The new paintings all feature the artist, at home, painted realistically, but with non-realistic paint added. Here's an example:

Some, like this one, seem anxiety-inducing. I feel the paint is sneaking up on her unawares.

I wonder if she feels that way because she feels her life being overtaken by her art. My wife tells me that 50% of my brain has been taken over by a rhyming engine. Maybe it's something like that.

My favorite of the show is called "Cake," and it shows the artist in control of her paint. She is in the kitchen, making a cake, but she's doing it with brightly colored paint that she ladles on. I haven't found a good picture online, but you can see some of it the background in this photo from the well-attended opening:

I also had a substantial conversation with the gallery's proprietor, Kimberly Atwood, who besides being a curator is a professional photographer. I expect to be back.

Can love of paint
begin to taint
your soul?

Do you ever feel it start
to slip out of control?

A life in art
is not for the faint
of heart.

J'accuse

I'm sick of the blame game,
so I'm polishing my glare.

I'm going to name and shame
finger pointers everywhere.

ήλεκτρον

I made some joke about the stage play, Electra, being "Electra-fying". And some friends thought it was a horrible pun. Which it was. But the 2 words are actually related, long lost cousins of a sort, and I simply re-uniting them.

Both the name "Electra' and our word "electricity" derive from the Ancient Greek word for "amber".

You can see why you would name a girl after a precious stone. Even in English, we name girls Amber.

But what, you may wonder, does amber have to do with electricity?

Ancient Greeks discovered that amber behaved oddly - like attracting feathers - when rubbed by fur or other objects. They didn't know what it was that caused this phenomenon. But the Greeks had discovered one of the first examples of static electricity.

This created a charge, albeit weak.
Such were the limits of antique Greek technique.

Fabulous

The Zeaster Bunny
doesn't think your lack of belief is funny.

Electra

Anna Weiler as Electra.

I saw Electra, by Jeremy Menekseoglu, at Dream Theatre tonight.

Electra, a woman of powerful determination, and noble heritage, thirsts for revenge. Against her mother. For killing her father. She lives in a world of the sword and the ax, a world in which women cannot engage directly in mortal combat. A woman must enlist a fighting man as a champion, to do her bloody work.

Into her life walks Orestes, her long-lost brother. The recognition scene is clever, touching, restrained. She has found her champion.

This version of Electra explores the ways in which praise can go to your head, the ways women can manipulate men into doing their bidding, and the bitter taste of family revenge.

It's a bustling, busy play, with an honest-to-gods 5-woman chorus plus 6 regular (or perhaps irregular) characters. Anna Weiler, as Electra, is the center of the play, around whom the whirlwind swirls. She is a no-nonsense, hard-edged, get-things-done kind of woman, who is tired of being exiled to a swamp, and who jumps at her chance to really leave a mark in the world. Weiler brings fearsome, unyielding intensity to the role.

Menekseoglu plays Orestes, her lovable, malleable, but still deadly brother. He is genuinely likeable, but very scary when the time comes.

Bil Gaines plays Pamphilos, Electra's much-put-upon husband, who loves her, and desires her, but who is not allowed to touch her or see her bare. Gaines brings a down-to-earth sense of humor to his role as he tries to get along with the impossible woman he loves.

Rachel Martindale is regal as Electra's mother, flashing smoothly through pride, supplication, anger and fear. A master manipulator, she tells Electra some truths which Electra does not want to hear.

Giau Truong is Electra's mother's new husband, the usurper king. Giau deftly shows us his bluster, and the cowardice inside the bluster.

Danielle Gennaoui turns in a wonderfully annoying performance as a precious princess, daughter of Electra's mother with the new usurper husband. Her worshipful attitude toward her mother is played exquisitely.

Finally, there is the chorus, played by Alicia Reese, Molly Gray, Theresa Neef, Alison Faraj, and Annelise Lawson. They were hypnotically insane, less than human, but divinely inspired, and they even sang a song in harmony - in praise of motherhood, of all things.

The play moves along briskly, taut with suspense, with brief lyrical breaks, tender moments, and scary mayhem. I liked it. A lot. It's one of those plays that gives you plenty to think about.

At the heart of the Greek tragedies is troubled family life,
in complicated clans, replete with bloody strife,
as strong willed men and women defy all legal censure
and go to places most of us would never dare to venture.

The Affair

We read The Affair for our book study group.

Not that kind of affair. The "Dreyfus Affair" was a cause célèbre in France at the end of the 19th century and beginning of the 20th.

Basically, a French Jewish army officer was falsely accused of espionage and convicted, on thin evidence. He was sent off to Devil's Island.

At first, it may have been a too-hasty mistaken judgment. But then the evidence started looking like they had the wrong man. And important generals decided to cover up the problem to avoid embarrassment.

This dragged on through multiple court hearings and trials, much stonewalling and manufacturing of evidence on the part of the army.

After a long battle, which polarized French society, he was declared innocent - and he rejoined the army and served through World War I.

After long years
of being imprisoned and smeared,
he was freed and cleared.

Golden Years

Evaporation:

Early retirement is no longer the goal of most workers. Even retirement at age 65 now seems unattainable to many people. The majority of Americans now expect to work until age 65 or later.

The value in your I.R.A.
has flown away?

Just work till you croak.
and you'll never be broke.

Doctored Story

We have a bizarre story developing here:

A University of Iowa medical professor was ordered held in lieu of $25,000 bail today for allegedly lying to Chicago police officers, telling them he was stabbed while jogging on the Riverwalk when he actually knifed himself and fabricated the incident, authorities said.

He reportedly went to the hospital in critical condition after stabbing himself. You would think a medical professor would know how to stab himself so that he wasn't injured too badly.

Just to add to the bizarreness, the professor was already on leave from the U of Iowa pending some kind of investigation at the school.

The deceptive "rob & stab" story was notable partly because it happened in an unlikely area - a nice, shiny, touristy area.

If you want to meet a robber,
and then get stabbed or clobbered,
I'll gladly give you directions
to some of our rougher sections.

Dollars Per Barrel Vs. Dollars Per Ounce

People like to describe oil as immensely valuable, as if it were "black gold".

But if there were gold coins floating in the Gulf of Mexico, you can bet they wouldn't be there for long.

There'd be a flotilla
the size of Godzilla
the young and the old
scooping up gold.

Rajskub

I was amused by this quote from Mary Lynn Rajskub, who plays Chloe on 24. Apparently she used to do poetry slams:

When I first started performing, I was very uncomfortable. One night I got a few laughs when I wasn’t trying to be funny. That set me on a mission to see the humor in myself and follow a path to getting more laughs, often along with being uncomfortable. One of the very serious poets was upset because he felt he had lost me to comedy. “Really, Mary Lynn? Comedy?” And I never turned back.

My mind goes to Shakespeare, author of both comedies and tragedies.

Or was he 2 authors, one for each type -
one full of funny and one full of gripe?

Legacy

A mother leaves her mark,
encouraging the spark.

Bare Branches

Matt Welch claims:

We Are Out of Money: American governance won’t begin to inch forward until the political class faces basic facts.

What? No. It couldn't be.
Go pick some more from the money tree!

Run Down

Philip Pagano was run down by a train today. 

In his pocket was the official procedure which train crews are supposed to follow in case of a suicide.

You see, he was the head of the commuter train system in the Chicago area. And he was being investigated for financial irregularities, including giving himself an unauthorized bonus.

He was under a lot of strain,
probably eating away at his brain,
so he stepped in front of a train.

It's a rude thing to do,
traumatizing the crew,
delaying the passengers too.

Stars and Stripes for Sometimes

Cinco de Mayo fashion faux pas:

Five students at a California high school were forced to leave school and then face disciplinary action yesterday for the crime of wearing clothing printed with American flag designs.

It reminds me of this case from a few years ago, where a kid got in trouble for wearing a shirt that said "Bong Hits 4 Jesus":

A divided Supreme Court ruled Monday that schools can punish a student -- without violating his First Amendment rights -- when he promotes illegal drug use at a school event.

After all, isn't patriotism addictive? Sure, you start with an occasional item of clothing. Before you know it, you're wearing a flag pin every day. You even start to contemplate getting a tattoo of Old Glory on some body part.

All I can say is: check the calendar before decking yourself out in red, white, and blue!

Whether printed on your shirt,
or inked upon your knee,
speech that might hurt
should not be free.

(Important alert:
that was irony.)

Hybrid

Stephen Hicks notes:

The modern West is hybrid civilization, drawing upon competing ethical traditions from Greco-Roman culture and Judeo-Christian religion.

This put me in mind of an idea from biology, "hybrid vigor":

The term heterosis, also known as hybrid vigor or outbreeding enhancement, describes the increased strength of different characteristics in hybrids; the possibility to obtain a genetically superior individual by combining the virtues of its parents.

Greco-Roman culture was itself a kind of hybrid, between the Greeks and the Romans, obviously.

Christianity itself sprung to life in an interaction between Judaic culture and Greco-Roman culture. Jesus spoke a Semitic language, Aramaic, but the New Testament survived in Greek.

And there's a case to be made that the Judeo-Christian tradition includes elements absorbed from both Egyptian beliefs (you will be judged in the afterlife) and Zoroastrian beliefs (the world embodies a cosmic struggle between good and evil).

Here in America, just to complicate things, we now seem to be in the middle of an attempt to come to terms with some Eastern belief systems.

With logic from the Greeks
we sort through diverse convictions.

The mind painstakingly seeks
belief without contradictions.

Note to Self

When pursued by the FBI
you can blow the whole game
if you try to fly
under your own name.

Before Da Vinci's Helicopter

Unlike the acorn, the maple seed can fall pretty far from the tree.

High-speed video reveals that maple seed pods remain airborne for miles by harnessing the power of tornado-like vortexes generated as they spin.

The flat, elongated pods are densest at their seed-containing ends, a configuration that causes them to rotate while falling.

Rotation produces the pods’ nickname — whirlybirds — and creates tiny vortexes above their leading edges. By pulling in air, a vortex lowers air pressure above a pod’s surface, effectively sucking it upwards.

It's the season here. Walking home, I had to make my way through a storm of the things.

With whirling grace
they go,
seeking a place
to grow.

What Counts As Conspiracy

The judge has ordered the Hutaree "militia" members free on bond, and she seems doubtful about the evidence presented to her:

"Discussions about killing local law enforcement officers -- and even discussions about killing members of the judicial branch of government -- do not translate to conspiring to overthrow, or levy war against, the United States government," Roberts said in her order.

I knew a lot of people who discussed killing Bush. None of them were charged. And the reason is precisely that they didn't take steps toward action.

You can't keep creeps in jail

just for their idle chat.

The judge has granted bail,

and the case looks strangely flat.

And Now It's A Remake

Mary Catelli linked to a humorous essay, How 'The Karate Kid' Ruined The Modern World:

You know what I'm talking about; the main character is very bad at something, then there is a sequence in the middle of the film set to upbeat music that shows him practicing. When it's done, he's an expert.

His thesis is that rather than just being a transparent storytelling device, this sort of sequence is seriously misleading to people, who then get disappointed when they find out that achievement generally requires lots of effort.

When you seem to be lacking in speed
sometimes patience is all you need.

What A Joker

The North Star, madly delirious,
asked the Dog Star, "Why so Sirius?"

Slick

As the oil slick spread last weekend, Obama took a vacation weekend in North Carolina.

Some people, like the NY Times, are now complaining that he has not done enough fast enough.

But I say the blame must be shared with other world leaders. This was BRITISH Petroleum, in the Gulf of MEXICO.

Who cares that Obama left town?
I blame Gordon Brown!

And I call upon all undocumented speakers of Spanish,
to help us make the oil slick vanish.

Running On Empty

A mystery of the East:

Indian doctors are studying an 83-year-old holy man who claims to have spent the last seven decades without food and water.

I guess he could be lying. Or... a friend suggested this syndrome as an explanation:

Nocturnal eating syndrome is often associated with somnambulism. People get up and eat, or even prepare meals, while asleep.

Do you wake from your sleep
to find crumbs getting deep
near the head
of your bed?

That's one of the clues
that you dine while you snooze.