Don't Try This At Home

Bail has been set
for a self-appointed vet
who tried surgery on his pet:

Gibbs told the officers he had been using a butcher knife to remove a cyst from under the dog’s ear, and had turned on the water in the bathtub to clean up the dog, according to police and prosecutors.

He was caught because water from the bathtub spilled to the apartment below his.

He was found naked and drunk, covered in blood. He told the cops he was a cardiologist. But it sounds like he's actually a hospital administrator.

I hope the dog is okay.

Surgical techniques cannot be mastered
when plastered.