Thursday, April 20, 2017

Free Will Microchips

Scott Adams has a blog post, "You Don’t Have Free Will – but You Might Get It Someday".

He claims we don't have free will, based on at least 2 different arguments. The first is "laws of physics" and the second is "we follow our strongest urge at any given moment". In his mind they run together as one. The laws of physics generate those urges and we obey.

But, he says, what if we could insert microchips to control our brains? Wouldn't we have more freedom then? We could use reason now to control urges later!

I thought of Odysseus, of course, who wanted to hear the sirens' call and survive, and who had himself tied to the mast of his ship, and had all his crew stuff their ears with wax.

I thought of Aquinas, of course, who warned men to avoid the "occasion of sin" - to structure their lives so that they were not led into temptation.

Rational people have always found ways to fight
The tyranny of appetite.

Wednesday, April 19, 2017


I've been noticing a very annoying new usage, wandering in from the academic world, of referring to people as bodies. Live people. In all apparent seriousness. I have the vague idea this comes from Foucault, a French guy I haven't really read.

I mean, I might say "the room was packed with warm bodies". But that's being funny.

Here's a standout example:

"Many infertile bodies are bodies who, like Miller and myself, delayed childbearing..."

I assume it is intended to be jarring, to refer to oneself that way, some kind of in-your-face materialism.

I assume also that it is insider lingo to those in the know.

I think there's something cloddy
About calling a person a body.

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Art Crisis Du Jour

The bull was there first, on Wall Street. Then someone threw the girl in, to make a combination set of figures. The combo is supposed to be about feminist aspirations. But I don't think that's how it actually "reads" if you just look at it with unbiased eyes.

To me, this scene looks scary.
It's fine to be brave, but be wary.
I'm fearful this kid will get gored.
Somebody give her a sword!

Monday, April 17, 2017

Fraternal Of Course

In the anonymously sourced news from Jackson, Mississippi:

This Married Couple Took a DNA Test and Discovered They Are Biological Twins

Both adopted...
Same date of birth...
Similar looking...
For what it's worth,
I really think
They might have guessed
Even without
That fertility test.

Thanks Merjet!

Oh, Snopes thinks it's fake...

Sunday, April 16, 2017

Blessed Pilate?

I was reading a nice Easter piece by Kevin Williamson, and I came across this:

"In the Ethiopian church, Pilate is revered as a saint..."

I had no idea, so that sent me off on an investigation online.

Anyway, it's a complicated story, but just tracking the Ethiopian Church, there's a text they seem to be following, The Martyrdom Of Pilate, which I don't recall hearing of, but which has Pilate becoming a Christian and getting crucified:

'The blessed Pilate began to pray while hanging on the cross, and said : " O my Lord, I have polluted your holy cross by the hanging of my body on it, because it is a pure wood and my body is an impure body..."'

In this variant story,
Pilate dies in glory.

Saturday, April 15, 2017

Lois Lerner Again

You may recall that Lois Lerner, who used to work for the IRS, took the fifth in front of Congress when they asked her about the agency's treatment of would-be tax-exempt tea-party organizations.

For some reason, she's willing to testify now, in some civil case having to do with the same thing, but she wants to keep her testimony secret, on account of threats she has received:

'“Mss. Lerner and Paz have demonstrated that the public dissemination of their deposition testimony would expose them and their families to harassment and a credible risk of violence and physical harm,” they said in documents submitted by their lawyer to Judge Michael R. Barrett.'

I'm nosy, so I hope this all ends up in the open, but I'm very curious as to WHY she is willing to testify now, when she couldn't testify before, on account of maybe incriminating herself.

My problem is that I know just enough law, learned at the dinner table mostly, to be perennially curious about the peculiar workings of our legal system.

There's always an explanation of some sort
For all the strange things that go on in court.

Friday, April 14, 2017


Yoga is not nearly the pure Hindu thing a lot of people think it is, but if you attend enough classes you do tend to hear some Eastern spirituality stuff.

You might think that's fine...

"But at Benedictine College — a small and strongly Catholic liberal arts school in Atchison, Kan. — yoga classes per se will soon be yo-gone, out of apparent concern that use of the word “yoga” suggests advocacy for Hindu mysticism."

They're keeping the classes, but you might say they're rechristening them.

A pose by any other name
Will stretch your body just the same.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Short Plays Daze

I'm in the happy position of having three different ten-minute plays awaiting production for three different festivals.

And I'm not involved in the productions at all. That's very pleasant, insofar as I don't have to buy stuff, solve logistics problems, etc. But it's frustrating not to be watching rehearsals in advance of the show. I like rehearsals. It's where a lot of the creative side of acting takes place.

In rehearsal the actor designs
A plan for performing her lines.

Working The Bugs Out

Not a good day for this airline:

"The same day a passenger was infamously dragged off a United plane in Chicago, a man on a United flight from Houston to Calgary was allegedly stung by a scorpion."

The scorpion fell from an overhead bin
And stung somebody who touched him.
Alas, we must contact the bug's next of kin.
A flight attendant flushed him.

Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Doc Dragged Off Jet

I am entranced by the video of the doc being dragged, bloody and belly-exposed, off the United Jet.

It seems, to me
To hold a mystery.

To start with, why does he let out that strange wail as soon as the cop reaches for him? If it happened like that on stage, I would say it was unrealistic.

To middle with, how exactly does his face get bloody? Has the cop purposely banged his head, or was it some kind of stupid accident? There was a very early announcement from the Chicago Police Department that said the man had "fallen". But it turns out that wasn't an "official" announcement. And the cop in question works for the Aviation Department, not the Police Department. Anyway, we've heard nothing directly from the cop who pulled him out of the seat. He's on leave.

To end with, how does he end up on the plane again, after he has been dragged off, still bleeding, saying something about "Please kill me."?

I have no explanation. But I want one!

This strange airplane eviction,
In which his face got cracked,
Would not work well as fiction,
But there it is, in fact.

Monday, April 10, 2017

MCC and Me

I work near a bunch of federal buildings, but one in particular, the Chicago Metropolitan Correctional Center, attracted my eyes today.

First, at lunchtime:

Triangular correctional facility.
Escaping it requires some agility.

And, yes, it has been escaped. Twice!

Then, on my evening walk to the train station:

On trees outside the jail
The flowers do not fail
To recognize that Spring
Is now the thing.

Thursday, April 06, 2017

Wet Weather

We've got the lake in our backyard again.

Really it's just a few of inches of standing water. But when this happened last week, our neighbor's basement flooded with 4 inches of water. So I hope that doesn't happen again!

Four inches is enough
To ruin lots of stuff
That's sitting on the floor.
And cleaning's a soggy chore!

Sunday, April 02, 2017

Mysteries Solved

The X-ray revealed
Why his tummy was sore
And where he had lost
Those dentures he wore.

Saturday, April 01, 2017

No Fooling

April First in Massachusetts, so...
Of course there's snow.

Wednesday, March 29, 2017


A quart is so close to a liter,
Why don't we make them the same?
Conversions would be so much neater,
And we could get rid of one name!

Monday, March 27, 2017

Jones on Sweat

The Chicago Tribune has its theater critic, Chris Jones, reporting from New York on current offerings.

'"Sweat" is inarguably a schematic socialist drama — and hardly the first to play at Broadway prices to mostly upper-middle-class urbanites — that clearly decided in advance what it wanted to say about the state of the nation.'

I guess that I'm a member
Of the upper middle class
But if this play comes near me
I'm giving it a pass.

Sunday, March 26, 2017

English of All Things

The English language is a big collision
Of French and German all mixed up pell-mell.
So purists often view it with derision
But for some reason it has spread quite well.
It started on an island. The Atlantic
Surrounds the place and seemed to hem them in.
But then they took to ships. They seemed quite frantic,
And spread their babble everywhere they'd been.
So here we are today and this strange language
Will "get you by" in lands the world round.
Its spelling is a curse, its grammar anguish,
But everywhere you go, it can be found.
I feel some sympathy for those who spurn it,
But lots of babies seem to like to learn it.

Saturday, March 25, 2017


Something I realized only yesterday:

These two ten-minute plays of mine - the ones I have coming up in festivals in May and June - have something conspicuous in common: each centers on an interrogation.

The methods of interrogation are actually quite opposite. The genres are deeply dissimilar - realistic police procedural vs. science fiction comedy. The themes of the two festivals are not related: "empathy" vs. "graduation party".

But somehow my under-brain wanted to write about interrogation, apparently. I have no idea why, offhand. I mean, it's a topic I'm interested in, but I don't recall any conscious fascination with it lately.

I let my writing gift me with a puzzle.
Better, I feel, than putting on a muzzle.
The Muse, to be seduced, must be obeyed.
Without her aid, the play does not get made.

Two Ten-Minute Play Festivals

I'm very happy to announce that I've got plays in two upcoming ten-minute play festivals.

The Empathy Festival, from Talif Productions, runs Tuesdays during May, here in Chicago. Facebook page here. Tickets will go on sale here. My play is contemporary, and based on a real incident. My version involves two female cops, engaged in a very tense discussion about a cold murder case. It's called "Fellow Officers". The theme of this festival is, indeed, empathy, and my story illustrates the way empathy can be used as a tool during an interrogation.

The Heartland 10-Minute Play Festival runs weekends during June, 2 hours from Chicago in Normal, Illinois. It's an annual festival, and this year's theme was "Graduation Party". My play is set in my comical science fiction future, when intelligent cats are roaming outer space, and is called "Space Cat Graduation".

I really like the 10-minute play form, which I think is sort of a new form, or sort of a newly popular form perhaps. When I say new, I mean maybe in the last 20 years. At least, a lot of ordinary people my age have never even heard of it. Anyway, the effect is kind of like a extra short story.

You string 8 or so of them together to make an evening's entertainment. Usually that's 8 of them by 8 different authors. And that's the overarching "10 minute play festival" format.

It's an evening of short stories
Through divergent territoties.

Friday, March 24, 2017


Enlightened but impoverished gentleman: woke broke bloke.

Tokyo to Chicago

Flying over Anchorage at night
Staring at a land piled high with snow
I saw the city's streetlights burning bright
And felt the urge to visit them below
To learn what sort of hardy souls reside
In coldness that I'd rather not abide.

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Where the Day Starts

He thought the International Date Line
Was a phone number he could dial to call
To ask some foreign women out to dine.
But sad to say, that wasn't it at all.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

In Hong Kong Harbour

The helicopter, like a dragonfly
Buzzes above the water, black against the sky.
It races past our boat, we raise our heads
To watch this great contraption chop the air to shreds.

Monday, March 20, 2017


I'm in Kowloon, but sad to say,
No cows or loons are here today.

What I find really surprising
Is that no one has sued the place for false advertising.

Kowloon is a part of Hong Kong that's not on the island of Hong Kong. It's on the mainland geographically, but part of Hong Kong politically and economically.

As for crazy lawsuits -
Is that just in the USA?
It's full employment for lawyers -We keep them busy that way.

Saturday, March 18, 2017


If you're angry with a friend
On their natal anniversary
Do make sure to send
Berated wishes, sharp and cursory.

Thursday, March 16, 2017

The Mysterious East

Now that I've read,
I'll try not to shed.

Monday, March 13, 2017


We were walking through the government section of Tokyo, when my daughter was surprised to notice lots of green-with-a-sword Saudi flags flying. She surmised that some state visit must be happening. So I saw the front page of a newspaper this morning, and sure enough:

"Saudi King brings two golden escalators... for four day trip to Japan"

Apparently the escalators are for getting on and off his jet.

The Saudis sell Japan a lot of oil, but that business is not as profitable as it was, and they are hoping to sell other stuff to Japan. What other things they have to sell... I'm not clear on.

The Saudis are looking to diversify
Now that oil prices are not so high.

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Nunchucks in Jpan

Weapons charges reversed:

"On March 8, Judge Kazuo Oizumi of the Hiroshima High Court reversed the weapon concealment conviction of a 48-year-old chiropractor. The previous conviction was handed down after a police officer discovered three pairs of nunchaku in the man's car while questioning him in the parking lot of a convenience store."

A chiropractor would know how to whack
Those wacky sticks all over your back.
I have to admit that the bones in my spine
Were so scared by this story, they jumped into line.

Yesterday In The Air

We fly toward the sunset
At thirty thousand feet.
It hasn't disappeared yet.
Jet travel's quite the feat.

Friday, March 10, 2017

Thursday, March 09, 2017

Never Laugh At An Ideograph

Over at Language Log:

"People often ask me questions like these: What's the easiest / hardest language you ever learned?"

Mandarin, he says, is both:
It's easy to learn to speak,
But mastering reading and writing
Will make your brain cells shriek.

Wednesday, March 08, 2017


I saw a very bright one, this morning.

Cardinal, how did you get so red,
From the tip of your tail to the top of your head?
I wonder, when you were learning to fly,
Did you happen to dive in a bucket of dye?

Tuesday, March 07, 2017

Turtle With A Taste For Cold Hard Cash


Turtle That Ate Nearly 1,000 Coins Recovering From Surgery In Thailand

It's a 25-year-old sea turtle whose life was threatened because it kept eating the coins that people were tossing into its pond "for luck".

It wasn't such good luck for the turtle, whose belly shell was starting to crack. Fortunately, a vet seems to have saved the day. Hopefully the turtle will make a full recovery.

The situation's funny
But don't give turtles money!

Monday, March 06, 2017

Entrance to a Tiki Bar

This is part of the decor as you walk down the stairs to Three Dots And A Dash, a Tiki Bar here in Chicago:

I can't explain,
I need to mull:
Outside my brain
There lives a skull.

Somehow or other, my body has grown
A jointed framework made of bone,
And here's a thing that's odder still -
This skeleton generally does my will.

Sunday, March 05, 2017


Today I saw what I believe were huge flocks of crows flying against the grey cotton-candy sky. I didn't get a chance to see any of them land, but they looked like crows, not gulls.

So, what's funny, is that there haven't been a lot of crows around here for years - not since the coming of the West Nile Virus, which was over a decade ago.

I'm guessing they were migrating. It's March. We've had some pretty nice weather. Maybe they think spring is here!

Vast crowd of crows,
Please pass this area by.
Virus-bearing mosquitoes
Here will make you die.

Thursday, March 02, 2017

Wednesday, March 01, 2017

Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Lyrical vs. Ballad

Lyric poetry - Shakespeare's sonnets - is poetry that resembles songs, often devoted to expressing a feeling. Narrative poetry - Shakespeare's Venus and Adonis - is poetry that is focused on telling a story.

The distinction showed up in my continued reading of Megashift from Plot to Character In American Short Fiction, although the terminology is slightly different. Here the author is talking about Washington Irving, the guy who wrote Rip Van Winkle and the Legend of Sleepy Hollow:

"Irving was fully conscious of the tension in the short story between the lyric impulse, with its stress on unity of emotion, and the ballad impulse, with its emphasis on a controlled unity of action." [p. 27]

So "ballad" here stands in for what I would call narrative. It's funny how slippery literary terms are. Different groups of writers just have different terms for talking about things. It makes discussions harder!

I mean, why talk about prose short stories in terms that refer more properly to poetry?

A dictionary of literary terms,
I'm sad to say, is like a bucket of worms:
You pick one out, and sure enough, it squirms.

Monday, February 27, 2017

Megashift from Plot to Character

I'm reading an interesting book, Megashift from Plot to Character In American Short Fiction : A Critical Study, 1900-1941

That's a mouthful of a title. Yes, it was a doctoral dissertation. The author is Qi Ye, and I don't know much about him, although he did earn his PhD here in Illinois.

Anyway, plot and character have both, always, been contributors to a good story, and the debate over which is more important goes back at least to Aristotle. But as Qi Ye sets out to document, there was a critical push against plot among the literary elite early in the 20th century.

Plot became a dirty word in such circles, and O. Henry, who had been so honored for his surprise endings, met with a surprise ending of his own: after his death, his surprise endings were held as a mark against him.

Of course, you should bear in mind
The reading public continued to find
His surprises delightful
And far from frightful.

Indeed, here he describes the inciting incident that led to the writing of this book:

'One surprising fact that caught my attention during my teaching of an introductory course in prose fiction at Illinois State University (Spring 1992) was that almost all the students reacted enthusiastically to O. Henry's "The Gift of the Magi," especially to the ending where it is revealed that Della and Jim have each sacrificed their most valuable possession to buy the other the best Christmas gift possible within their meager financial power, while the same students did not react so warmly to the surprise endings of William Faulkner's "A Rose for Emily" and Ernest Hemingway's "The Snows of Kilimanjaro," stories which are favored by critics.'

Saturday, February 25, 2017

Writing by Hand

I was looking at a site about learning Japanese. And came across the advice that there was no need to practice writing it.

"When's the last time you actually wrote something by hand? Probably the last time you had to sign your name on a receipt at a restaurant."

And... a few weeks ago, I was writing a ten-minute play in a notebook, and a young person asked me, with curiosity and surprise, if I was actually writing in cursive. Which I was. It's not how I usually write plays. But I didn't have a computer handy.

I have become a beast of yore,
A cursive-writing dinosaur!


I was translating... well, I had used an automated translation of an article by Maria Marty from Spanish to English... but I was going back through the result and fixing it up. And I came across the Spanish word: victimismo. And I knew that the parallel English word would be victimism. But is that a word? It turns out that it is, but it's rare.It seems to be less rare in Spanish.

Anyway, what does the Spanish word mean?

tendency to see oneself as being victimized

So, it's not victimhood, or victimization, as such. It's more what we mean when we say "victim mentality". And if you google the rare English word "victimism", the first hit is to the Wikipedia article on "Victim mentality", which has this sentence:

"The term is also used in reference to the tendency for blaming one's misfortunes on somebody else's misdeeds, which is also referred to as victimism."

If we think of victimism as an ideological "ism", it might translate into normal English discourse as "the cult of victimhood", which is rather derogatory, of course, and is often a term used on the right, not the left. Partly because there is a left/right split on the "free will" issue, the left leans toward seeing people as tossed about by circumstance, and the right leans toward seeing people as responsible for their own circumstances.

Both your choices
And your chances
Help determine
Your circumstances.

Friday, February 24, 2017

Passing on the Gift of Prometheus

The NY Times had an article about a German program which teaches children how to safely start fires.

"Mr. Karawahn’s workshops aim to prevent tragedies caused by children playing with fire in secret. Young children who make a fire alone often won’t tell adults for fear of punishment. Even worse, they sometimes hide after setting a fire and end up dying from smoke inhalation."

I suspect teaching about it
Has to be sound.
No culture living without it
Has ever been found.

One Lonely Night

I reread the first chapter of Mickey Spillane's One Lonely Night the other day. I hadn't read it in decades. It's a very striking chapter in which the tough guy detective hero, Mike Hammer, struggles with a disturbance in his soul, a doubt as to whether he is actually a good guy or a bad guy. In the book, this has been brought on by a judge who has let him walk free, but who has righteously condemned him as a monster who lives just inside of the law.

This time, when I was reading, I thought - oh my, the detective's self-doubt is a stand-in for the writer's self doubt after being shredded by a chorus of self-righteous critics.

So, today I was at the library, and was looking at what somebody else wrote about Spillane in an introduction, and this guy, who knew Spillane personally, specifically put forth the same theory.

Spillane, back in the fifties, sold tons of books but was a lightning rod for criticism.

He rubbed the elite the wrong way
In the culture wars of his day.

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

A Theater Company's Sudden Demise

It's funny, I just got a postcard advertising their upcoming production:

"Dead Writers Theater to Close in Wake of Harassment Allegations"

It all happened this week, very quickly. It started when the theater's artistic director threatened to derail the career of an actress, Megan Delay. In a public Facebook thread, he told her he could "easily smear" her.

"It was the tipping point that unleashed the Chicago theater community on social media in what some might well consider a mob-mentality takedown Tuesday afternoon."

I saw her last summer in their production of The Importance Of Being Earnest. I thought she was quite strong and funny. Here she is in a publicity shot from that production, with Jack Dryden:

What started the immediate ruckus? The actress bowed out of a role, 10 days before rehearsals were set to start. It is, of course, annoying to the producer and director when something like this happens. They have to scramble to refill the role. I know. I've been there. Last time it happened to me, it was 10 days before opening. I could hear the blood pounding in my ear when I got the news. But, you know, stuff happens, and sometimes you have to roll with it.

Someone bailing out of your production,
Is not a reason to threaten career destruction.

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Results Oriented

I'm here to review
My lab work with you.

Please be patient while I retrieve it.
It's so good you won't believe it.

Monday, February 20, 2017


A pangolin
Has scaly skin
But can't play scales
On a mandolin.
Nor can he tango
In trade for a mango
No matter how jolly
A mood he's in.

Sunday, February 19, 2017

Self Surveillance

If you want to brag about criminal acts,
Film them all to prove they are facts. 
Viewers will know they aren't being deceived, 
And you will be glad your behavior's believed. 
But should the police obtain the recording, 
You may find that crime is no longer rewarding.

Hunger in America

I remain puzzled about hunger in America. It's evidently a sort of shorthand phrase for insufficient food. I mean, I get hungry every day, which is why I eat, but that's not what they're talking about. So, who has insufficient food? We're not talking about eating-disorder people, or people on hunger strikes, so we must be talking about people who are low on money to buy food. These are the people for whom there are private and governmental food programs. But we also hear a lot about obesity among the poor, so these programs must be working pretty well overall, except that maybe they need to deliver more Lean Cuisine to the heavier recipients. And speaking of the heavy, that's a group of people who are hungry a lot, from what I've seen.

It's a verity
Then and now
Needs to chow.

Saturday, February 18, 2017

Dancing at Lughnasa

I finally saw my first Brian Friel play tonight, namely Dancing at Lughnasa. It's a charming play, with a very loosely structured plot, if plot is what you wish to call it, and an adult narrator who is remembering things that happened when he was seven. The core of the play is the household of 5 unmarried sisters, who are lovingly sketched.

I did not know what the title meant. I had assumed that Lughnasa was a place. But no, it is a time, a harvest festival.

"The festival itself is named after the god Lugh. It involved great gatherings that included religious ceremonies, ritual athletic contests (most notably the Tailteann Games), feasting, matchmaking and trading. There were also visits to holy wells... Lughnasadh customs persisted widely until the 20th century, with the event being variously named 'Garland Sunday', 'Bilberry Sunday', 'Mountain Sunday' and 'Crom Dubh Sunday'."

How do you say
The name of Lugh?
Simply enough:
It rhymes with Hugh.

Friday, February 17, 2017

Romantic Realism and Joseph Conrad

"Joseph Conrad also called himself a Romantic Realist." That's something Ayn Rand remarked in a Q&A. Was she right?

There's a 1922 book, Joseph Conrad: His Romantic-Realism, by Ruth Stauffer, which I have a copy of and the text of which is available online. The author argues that Conrad should be viewed, indeed, as a Romantic Realist. You might think that if Conrad had identified himself as such, that Stauffer would make a point of citing this self-identification. But, no.

Today I did a little more digging on this, looking into Conrad's preface to his novel, The Nigger of the Narcissus. Wikipedia says: "The author's preface to the novel, regarded as a manifesto of literary impressionism, is considered one of Conrad's most significant pieces of non-fiction writing." Anyway, in this preface, Conrad seems reluctant to accept literary labels:

"The enduring part of them - the truth which each only imperfectly veils - should abide with him as the most precious of his possessions, but they all: Realism, Romanticism, Naturalism, even the unofficial sentimentalism (which like the poor, is exceedingly difficult to get rid of), all these gods must, after a short period of fellowship, abandon him..."

Anyway, if I have to guess, Rand may have been misled about Conrad's exact views, perhaps because she ran into this book or its title somewhere, like on a public library shelf.

Literary schools
supply great bags of tools,
but the struggling writer, still,
is left with lots of pages to fill.

Thursday, February 16, 2017

Relative Positions

I noticed recently, while walking home from the train, that Venus and Mars were very close to each other in the Western evening sky, but that Venus was rather bright and Mars was rather dim. I figured this meant that Venus was close and Mars was far, and that their "closeness" was just a matter of line-of-sight.

So, I found this nice snapshot of where all the planets are right now. Here's a cropped version:

As expected, Venus is near, and Mars is far, but if you are sitting on Earth they are in the same little piece of the sky.

I left Jupiter in, because when walking my dogs, I had noticed that Jupiter was visible, and quite bright, on the Eastern horizon, before midnight. And, somewhat logically, Jupiter is on the "opposite" side of Earth, and fairly close.

I'm not sure about the scaling in the snapshot diagram. But the relative positioning at least makes sense.

Where I live, the city's light
Is so darned bright
That it's hard to see stars at night.

Painting the Sky

Sun does a fine job of setting
Despite inadequate vetting.

Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Gimme Shelter

They were set up to film stuff downtown today on Van Buren street - with the shiny white trailers beloved by the film crews, at least around here. I don't know what show they were filming - I don't pay attention. But one of the white trailers had a sign on it that caught my eye:

We don't usually get tornadoes downtown. But if we did, you would not be heading for this trailer. You would be heading for an actual concrete and steel building, preferably toward the basement thereof.

So, maybe it's some kind of inside joke, some union humor about getting away from the director's mad orders.

So while the sign appears legit,
Maybe that's the joke of it.

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

V Day

I hear it's a day for heart to heart,
A trying day to be apart,
And often a day that's hard as stone
For those who find themselves alone

Monday, February 13, 2017

Snow Day

I think the weather is rather pleasant, for winter, back in Chicago. But here in the Beantown area it has been snowing a lot, so our flight out, scheduled for today, was cancelled, and now we are here an extra day, enjoying the company of my son, his wife, and their child, in their roomy new house.

The company's good.
The house is warm.
Bemoaning the snow
Would be poor form.

Saturday, February 11, 2017


Snow in New England. 
Not exactly news. 
Sort of an incentive 
To stay inside and snooze.

Thursday, February 09, 2017

Chromatic Chaos

"HANAHAN, S.C. (AP) — No one seems to know why there's an orange alligator in a pond near Charleston."

"In a photo provided by Stephen Tatum, an orange alligator is seen near a pond in Hanahan, S.C. Photos show the 4- to 5-foot-long alligator on the banks of a retention pond at the Tanner Plantation neighborhood."

It's a sign of the times -
A gator that's orange!
But nothing quite rhymes
With that color.

Wednesday, February 08, 2017

Prez Name Coincidence

Trump and Truman both
Begin "T. R. U. M."
Maybe that's all that's common
Between the two of THEM!

Tuesday, February 07, 2017


Watched the first episode of APB, a science fictionish cop show set in Chicago, where a tech billionaire outfits one district with a lot of cool high tech gizmos that mostly don't really exist yet, in neighborhoods that aren't quite realistic either.

If the series continues, I predict that eventually, to keep it from being too easy for our hero, a criminal mastermind will appear on an ongoing basis, who fights our good police tech with nasty criminal tech.

To maintain dramatic traction
Get an opposite reaction.

Sunday, February 05, 2017

Superb Owl LI

Finally score a touch down
And they blow the extra point.
The Patriots can't catch a break
In this bad luck joint.

Actually, the Patriots got very lucky right after that.

The birdwatchers who anticipated
A superb owl,
Felt their hopes deflated
And began to howl.

Wednesday, February 01, 2017

Feb 2

I'm gonna catch that groundhog
Put him in some groundhog stew.
Yeah I will catch that groundhog
Groundhog stew is what I'll do.
Cause I'm so sick of winter
Leaving me so cold and blue.

Putting Jurisprudence Aside

How could he pick a dude
With a hard-to-rhyme name like Gorsuch?
Really it's rather rude.
Don't nominate any more such!

Monday, January 30, 2017

Been Dumb So Long

Been reading fake news
Reading it since I began to crawl
If it wasn't for fake news
I wouldn't have no news at all.

Sunday, January 29, 2017

I Do Not Like A Green Card Ban

I hear they've reversed the peculiar ban on "green card holders" from re-entering the US from countries of concern.

Permanent residents
Welcome back.
Your current president
Cut you slack...
Or maybe realized
He'd overstepped.
Some promises really
Should be kept.

We've had some green card terrorists I believe. And citizen terrorists and every other kind of terrorist. But unless you've got a particular reason to ban particular people, it seems unfair to lock people out while they were on vacation or business trips.

Saturday, January 28, 2017

Happy Opening

Cat opened well. We had a nice audience, 3 times the size of the sizable cast, and they laughed a lot, which meant their attention was held. Cat has a lot of humor in the script, but I fear it's not often found.

If you've never seen the show, but would like to, and you live in the area, I recommend it. It's a crisp production with a lot of strong performances.

Critical discussions of the play often focus on its tragic aspects, and it's a grim play in many many ways, but, on the other hand, it's a story about two hard-driving women who have married into a wealthy family who are competing to inherit and control that wealth. Hence, the cattiness. And the more sympathetic of the two unscrupulous women wins at the end. At least, this is the ending in our version! The situation has its comic aspect.

Anyway, slight change of topic, the play has been published in at least three versions, and I was comparing two of them at the library yesterday. I found that the Broadway version had some of "my" lines in the mouth of Big Mama:

"In my day they had what they call the Keeley cure for heavy drinkers. But now I understand they just take some kind of tablets."

In one way it makes sense for me to say this. I'm the doctor in the room. But on Broadway it was a little monologue by Big Mama, thinking about possible treatments for her heavy-drinking son.

There's a follow-up line, one I've written about before:

"They call them 'Annie-bust' tablets."

In the Broadway version, Big Mama said this. In the later version, her other son says this. 'Annie-bust' is a pun on Antabuse, a pun hardly any younger person is going to recognize nowadays, because Antabuse is no longer in favor as a treatment for drinking problems.

Moving dialog from mouth to mouth is something playwrights are given to doing in the process of revision. They want to get some lines into the play, and they're not sure who should say them. In narrative fiction, if you have something you just want to say, you can say it as the narrator. But in stage plays, usually you've got to give your words to a character.

Everyone is accustomed
To a narrator on the page
But he's just another character
When you put him on the stage.

California Dreaming

When California
Secedes by vote
Will they let me visit
Or build a moat?

Friday, January 27, 2017

Opening Tomorrow

It's photographic proof:
Cast on a hot tin roof.

Thursday, January 26, 2017


Our murder rate in Chicago has been high lately and now our prez has taken an interest. I'm not sure what he's going to do. Should be interesting.

Our murder rate
Is not so great.

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Imagine That

I find that my life lacks
Sufficient alternative facts.
Don't worry, I plan to make
Some up on my coffee break.

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Peaceful In Chicago

From what I can tell, the march of women went peacefully here. Some traffic laws were probably broken, some parade permits probably ignored, but none of this burning and breaking that was perpetrated in other towns. Basically a bunch of people gathered in a park then wandered around downtown for a while on a pleasant Saturday.

Our murder rate has been the talk of the nation, lately.
So the peacefulness of this march pleases me greatly.

Saturday, January 21, 2017

The Peaceful Transfer of (Way Too Much) Power

I have to admit, I was amused by this:

"Here’s the thing: I’m a libertarian. I’ve been surrounded by people who don’t agree with me for as long as I can remember and it has never occurred to me to isolate myself from everyone because of our political differences. Certainly not to assault them. Nor am I filled with anxiety by the thought that people who work in my home might have different political views than mine. To me, you’re all a bunch of fascists. But I’ve somehow learned to live with you."

On the other hand, as Tom Wolfe so pithily put it:

“The dark night of fascism is always descending in the United States and yet lands only in Europe.”

Here I am, at 64, with more faith in my country than a lot of my countrymen seem to have. I don't think this will be the end of freedom here. I think Americans love freedom in their hearts, even when they embrace theories and politicians with tyrannical leanings. And I think James Madison gave them a written constitution that still, after two centuries, gives them the ability to protect freedom.

When I say that Americans love freedom in their hearts, that's a metaphor, that's metonymy, using a body part to stand for a whole self.

As Rand wrote:

'An American is an independent entity. The popular expression of protest against "being pushed around," is emotionally unintelligible to Europeans, who believe that to be pushed around is their natural condition. Emotionally, an American has no concept of service (or of servitude) to anyone. Even if he enlists in the Army and hears it called "service to his country," his feeling is that of a generous aristocrat who chose to do a dangerous task. A European soldier feels that he is doing his duty.'

I think the two-party system has its strengths, and that even though both parties have deep faults, it's important to rotate them periodically. It may not be the best method of self-rule, but it's what we've got.

This president is definitely giving me a science-fiction vibe. I under-estimated the man's ability to get elected. I don't feel that I really understand him, but he does remind me of people I knew when I lived in Queens, which is where he grew up. He's a familiar sort of character in that respect.

My countrymen do not always do what I think is sensible. They have their peculiar enthusiasms. But I grew up with them, I live with them, and on the whole I love their company, those of both parties, and those of no party at all.

Although I'm concerned and a bit perplexed,
I'm waiting to see what happens next.

Friday, January 20, 2017

Breaking Out The Costumes

Big Daddy and Big Mama
Rehearsing the Williams drama.

Tech Week starts this coming Monday, but we finally put on costumes yesterday. That's Wina Shelley and Ken Evans in the photo, and Wina is looking very distressed.

Big Daddy is a rich man
With the manners of a peasant
And when he thinks he's lied to
He's ferociously unpleasant.

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Who Will Quit?

I read a report about a survey saying that a quarter or so of the federal workforce might consider quitting due to unhappiness with the Donald.

I think it's like the celebrities who threatened to move to Canada.

I'm not losing any sleep.
Talk is cheap.

Monday, January 16, 2017

A Request

Alif Muhammad made a firm request:
That my next versifying post should be
Iambic, with five feet, since that's the best
Of all the meters found in poetry.
It's what Will Shakespeare used, at any rate,
In Hamlet and the Comedy Of Errors,
And English teachers swear those worked out great.
So let me join the valiant standard-bearers!
I write this in pentameter - I hope!
At least I write it in approximation
Of rhythms used by Wordsworth, Keats, and Pope.
Each turned vague thoughts into an exploration
Of beauty, truth, and how the human soul
Can somehow, through minutiae, grasp the whole.


Now that Bob Dylan
has won the Nobel,
Will Paul Simon be next?
No one can tell.

But it just occurred to me that two of his famous songs make reference to prophetic wall writing.

Early big hit:

"The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls"

And years later:

"When I think back
On all the crap I learned in high school
It's a wonder
I can think at all
And though my lack of education
Hasn't hurt me none
I can read the writing on the wall"

So, was the second a reference to the first?

That was my "duh!" of the day.

Sunday, January 15, 2017

Pitch Accent

Japanese has something we call "pitch accent". And when I say, "we", I mean people who know something about it, which actually excludes me.

Somehow it's different than the "tones" in Chinese.

Japanese has words which are the same two syllables, but mean distinctly different things when you pronounce them with different pitches.

"Hashi" can mean chopsticks, bridge, or edge, depending upon pitch.

We have some roughly parallel things in English, having to do with accent or emphasis. "Conduct" can be a verb or a noun, spelled the same, but pronounced differently: "He was supposed to conduct the school orchestra, but was expelled for bad conduct."

English isn't easy - at least that's what I've heard.
But somehow babies learn it, so I fear this view's absurd.
Best of all, it doesn't contain a single foreign word.

Saturday, January 14, 2017

Waiting For The Call

I hear we're going to have a celebrity-lite inauguration.

I have to admit, I'm not a big fan of the inaugural fuss that has ballooned over the years, and I haven't paid it much attention. I mostly remember that Robert Frost read a poem at Kennedy's inauguration, and that Maya Angelou read one at somebody else's.

Trump has not yet invited me
To his inauguration.
I'd gladly write some poetry
For this divided nation.
I'll even do it all for free
With perfect punctuation,
But maybe one obscenity
To cause a big sensation.

Doc Baugh Softens

Doc Baugh's role in Cat On A Hot Tin Roof is not a big one, and functionally he's kind of like a messenger in a Greek tragedy, the guy who delivers the bad news. In this case, the bad news is that Big Daddy has terminal cancer.

I find my portrayal of him, in our new production, is different than last time. I don't think it's so much that my interpretation has changed. I think it's that everybody around me has changed.

In the prior production, Big Mama seemed less willing to accept my bad news - seemed ferociously in denial - and I countered by being ferociously assertive.

A friend of mine, commenting on my performance, said something like: "Well, everyone else was being an a-hole, so why shouldn't you be one too?"

With changes of cast, you must
Let your self adjust.

Thursday, January 12, 2017

Easy Entry Dog Door Blues

Door for pooch
Lets burglar scooch.

"Home surveillance cameras capture thieves in Peoria who entered through dog door, left dog outside"

There's great video, because the victim had a lot of security cameras in place. And he had a big dog in the place, which comes out of the door before the burglar goes in. But the dog, perhaps a golden retriever type, seems to be pretty friendly, perhaps because the burglar brought treats.

A dog door for a Dachshund might
Be small enough to be all right
But a door big enough for a Golden
May result in your stuff getting stolen.

Wednesday, January 11, 2017


"A teenage girl who slipped into an abandoned Illinois prison for an urban adventure ended up serving a short sentence when she accidentally locked herself inside a cell."

Firefighters rescued her. Now she faces trespassing charges.

Perhaps when she is brought up for this crime,
She can say "I've already done my time."

Yahoo, We Hardly Knew You

Headline news:

"Marissa Mayer leaving Yahoo board after sale to Verizon; Yahoo will change name to Altaba"

Altaba? Is that supposed to sound like all these other "alt" things? Is it just me, or do a lot of these other alt things seem like they aren't all that different, just slightly repackaged versions of the old things?

I take the prefix "alt"
With a healthy dash of salt.

I'm skeptical. That's my fault.

Monday, January 09, 2017


Last month in Florida:

"Melissa Kitcher had full intentions of completing her first half-marathon Sunday, but it's safe to say she pictured it ending a little bit differently. Kitcher went missing for nearly 12 hours after running off the trail during the Trail Hog Half-Marathon at the Carlton Reserve near Venice in Sarasota County, Florida."

Her phone died just before the race started. So, that was a contributing factor.

I've taken some turns that were wrong
But none that went on quite so long.

A Puzzle

If you are only acquaintances,
Is it legal to play Words With Friends?
(When you are in my brain space,
The questioning never ends!)

Friday, January 06, 2017


Alt right, Alt left, Alt reality. Maybe it's because I've been watching the Amazon series, The Man In The High Castle, maybe it's just because American politics has taken such a surprising turn with the Trump victory, but lately I've been thinking about the wacky theory that alternate realities, very much like our own, exist.

So, in the alternate reality I contemplate, Trump lost.

In our real reality, there are rumors circulating that Hillary Clinton is thinking about running to be mayor of America's largest city.

Somehow I find it haunting
That on some alternate reality fork,
It's Trump who tweets about wanting
To be the Mayor of New York.

Weather Report

Cold, cold, cold. 

Gets old, old, old. 

Or could that just be me?

I wish it were seventy. 

Sunday, January 01, 2017

Happy New Year's Day

Slug found
On ground.

Well, more precisely, found on the street, in a neighboring suburb, while I was out doing a New Year's Day jog. I suspect someone was celebrating last night by shooting their 9 millimeter pistol into the air.

I'm guessing about the caliber, but I included a dime in the picture for a visual size reference.

I looked up an article, about whether a bullet shot into the air could kill you, which said that it would be almost impossible - if the shooter aimed straight up. But if the shooter aimed at a 45 degree angle, the consensus was that would be pretty dangerous. Anyway, I don't think this one hit anybody, although it looks like it got scratched up somehow.

Maybe they could lessen the chance of someone getting hurt
By shooting it downward into the dirt.