I am very sorry to have missed the coyote at Quizno's on Tuesday.
He walked into the downtown sandwich shop and hopped into an open cooler. Eventually Animal Control corralled him and released him on an estate in a posh northern suburb.
I believe this is all a front.
They paid the coyote to do this stunt.
Soon, like Jared, week after week
He'll show up in ads with his lean physique,
Bragging that all he ever eats
Is sandwiches made with Quizno's meat.
When interviewed, the coyote said:
"One roast beef. And hold the bread."